We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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