I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize