i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
