I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
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