Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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