Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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