if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize