Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Randomize
