you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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