I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Tomorrow, if I don't look at least 5% better than I do on a regular day to day basis, I want you to hit me and tell me that no one will ever love me if I continue to look like I just rolled out of a cocaine induced hibernation. I'm asking you for tough love.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Randomize
