SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
