i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
