just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Randomize
