Do vagina's smell?
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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