i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
she looked like the before picture.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
then he tried to convert me to islam
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
Randomize
