Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
