i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
Of course I have a pirate flag
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
