it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
Randomize
