Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize
