oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
