Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize