is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
