Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
Her vagina smelt so bad I lied and told her that I was married just so that she would leave.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize
