Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
