I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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