You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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