I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Randomize
