And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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