Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Randomize
