It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
