"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
So you had sex with my brother?
It sounds like you dont need me to answer that.
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
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