is wine microwaveable?
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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