Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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