Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
