Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Just saying. If you end up in canada tomorrow morning at least youll have my text to remind you how it happened
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
