are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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