No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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