Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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