That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I want you more than these girls want KFC
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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