Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
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