it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Randomize
