I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
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