I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
