Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Randomize
