No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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