Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
