are you still at the devil's house?
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Why didn't you tell me I was calling her by her sisters name all night?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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