sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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