Im bringing wine tonight. Its from a merlot from nashville. i bet it'll taste like infidelity and teenage pregnancy.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
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