All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
We haven't even moved into the apartment yet and she has already screwed two of our neighbors. This is going to be the longest 12 month lease of my life.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
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